There are times when flowers don’t make up for faults.
And when this time comes, that flowers don’t equal a real apology, you know something is wrong.
Instead of feeling your heart bounce and skip over the surprise, you fall to the ground like dirty laundry. Materialistic items aren’t what you want. All you want is her. But she’s somewhere else, with a group of her friends, and you’re all alone.
Loneliness isn’t your enemy. Knowing that you have someone to come home to, is your enemy when you realize no one is there.
It makes loneliness more lonely and unbearable.
Sunflowers were my favorite flowers. Now as I look over at them, as they sit in a plastic vase that once held paint brushes, with their stems criss-crossed, all I see is nothing. I see the absence of happiness.
So this is what I’ve learned. Don’t tell your partner your favorite flower, because one day they’ll ruin that connection you have had with the flowers. The flowers will no longer represent your happiness and your youth from childhood, but instead turn over and be empty and full of sadness.
Don’t tell your partner how you really feel. They will listen but they don’t acknowledge. They’ll say that they will do something different but they won’t. They will continue doing the same thing since day one.
Don’t get back together with that person. Even if they promise that “this time it will be different” and even if they say that you are the most important thing, just know, you aren’t important to them unless you are out of their life. They won’t learn one thing if you keep crawling back. So stay away.
That is what I’ve learned.
I took the flowers and mentally threw them into the ocean. The petals are tears from the sun, dipping into the blue waters of salt.